Journal Excerpt Wed 6/10/09 1:13 am
I wish I didn’t feel bad either. [I felt others picked up on my bad feelings.] I know I need to praise God and all that but I just don’t have the faith for it right now. That’s why I say it’s time for God to show up in a very real way. I know He likes to be all mysterious and He wants us to figure everything out and believe without any proof whatsoever but what kind of deal is that? If you really love someone why are you trying to make things difficult for them? If you want people to reach the destination why not guide them clearly to it? Why concoct a puzzling maze and give confusing directions?
Journal Excerpt Fri 6/12/09
Well I have a story I must share. Last night the service was over and I was helping Ms. D clean up. She wanted me to help her take some things into the sanctuary for the service tonight. Her back was hurting and in the sanctuary there were 2 teens sitting in the back near where we entered. D asked if they’d help us. The boy was hesitant but the girl immediately said yes. She had a great spirit. D asked them to take the things to the stage and said she’d give them some pizza. Well the girl got so happy! The boy was happy too but the girl started telling how she was so hungry and had already asked for pizza and been denied. She was fantasizing about food because she was so hungry. We all agreed that this was a divine setup. I don’t remember everything she said but she was telling the story and it was clear God had worked out all the details to bring her her heart’s desire.
She was still joyful and chattering about it when we went back to the snack room to get the pizza. I was the one distributing the pizza earlier so I knew where it was. We’d had a lot of pizza but it seems that some guy got the last of the pizza that was out as we were walking up. The teens were disappointed and said “That guy got the last of the pizza.” I said no way – that’s not the kind of God I serve. He didn’t bring you this far just to disappoint you. They were accepting fate but I was determined. I went inside and was looking around but found nothing. That girl had already rejoiced in her blessing – surely God wasn’t going to do that to her. I really wanted them to have their pizza. I was going to find some somewhere. I even was ready to give them money to get pizza. But then here came Ms. D with 2 pizzas and gave them a whole pizza. I was as happy as they were. I said I knew you were going to get your pizza – that’s the kind of God we serve. There’s no way He was going to disappoint them like that. The girl was too happy. We were all praising God for the blessing.
That’s a good lesson for me right now too. If I, as someone who didn’t even know them, felt that strongly that I didn’t want to see them disappointed, how much more is God on our side? There’s something about someone delighting in the Lord; that’s someone you don’t want disappointed. I’m getting a deeper take on delight in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart. When you’re delighting and bragging on God’s goodness and so happy to be His, He wants to shower you with blessings.
When I was going through my issues this week I told God that I was no longer going to worry about His reputation. Let Him defend His own name. But I did not want those teens to think of God as the One who raises hopes only to disappoint them. We are God’s hands and feet. He uses us to bless others. But I didn’t have to defend Him; He had the pizza for them. In the same way I’m sure God has good things planned for me. I’ve already rejoiced about some things. I sang songs and shouted and danced and then it looked like disappointment again. But God is not going to let me go out like that. Just like I told those kids – that’s not the kind of God He is.
I’m thinking about how the disappointments can make the blessings seem even sweeter. After those setbacks and disappointments the kids were even happier when that pizza was actually placed in their hands. They wouldn’t have had the same joy and appreciation if someone had just handed them pizza in the beginning. No, they were denied, then had time to deal with their hunger, then received a promise, encountered a disappointment then finally the blessing. Sweet! Now that pizza wasn’t just a pizza but a prize.
God teaches us how to appreciate blessings. He knows we don’t appreciate things that come too easily. And He knows that we have to be taught to trust Him. I’m learning that no matter what happens in the middle, in the end I’m going to receive whatever God promised. I’ve been learning that setbacks and disappointments are just part of the process.
I wish I didn’t feel bad either. [I felt others picked up on my bad feelings.] I know I need to praise God and all that but I just don’t have the faith for it right now. That’s why I say it’s time for God to show up in a very real way. I know He likes to be all mysterious and He wants us to figure everything out and believe without any proof whatsoever but what kind of deal is that? If you really love someone why are you trying to make things difficult for them? If you want people to reach the destination why not guide them clearly to it? Why concoct a puzzling maze and give confusing directions?
Journal Excerpt Fri 6/12/09
Well I have a story I must share. Last night the service was over and I was helping Ms. D clean up. She wanted me to help her take some things into the sanctuary for the service tonight. Her back was hurting and in the sanctuary there were 2 teens sitting in the back near where we entered. D asked if they’d help us. The boy was hesitant but the girl immediately said yes. She had a great spirit. D asked them to take the things to the stage and said she’d give them some pizza. Well the girl got so happy! The boy was happy too but the girl started telling how she was so hungry and had already asked for pizza and been denied. She was fantasizing about food because she was so hungry. We all agreed that this was a divine setup. I don’t remember everything she said but she was telling the story and it was clear God had worked out all the details to bring her her heart’s desire.
She was still joyful and chattering about it when we went back to the snack room to get the pizza. I was the one distributing the pizza earlier so I knew where it was. We’d had a lot of pizza but it seems that some guy got the last of the pizza that was out as we were walking up. The teens were disappointed and said “That guy got the last of the pizza.” I said no way – that’s not the kind of God I serve. He didn’t bring you this far just to disappoint you. They were accepting fate but I was determined. I went inside and was looking around but found nothing. That girl had already rejoiced in her blessing – surely God wasn’t going to do that to her. I really wanted them to have their pizza. I was going to find some somewhere. I even was ready to give them money to get pizza. But then here came Ms. D with 2 pizzas and gave them a whole pizza. I was as happy as they were. I said I knew you were going to get your pizza – that’s the kind of God we serve. There’s no way He was going to disappoint them like that. The girl was too happy. We were all praising God for the blessing.
That’s a good lesson for me right now too. If I, as someone who didn’t even know them, felt that strongly that I didn’t want to see them disappointed, how much more is God on our side? There’s something about someone delighting in the Lord; that’s someone you don’t want disappointed. I’m getting a deeper take on delight in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart. When you’re delighting and bragging on God’s goodness and so happy to be His, He wants to shower you with blessings.
When I was going through my issues this week I told God that I was no longer going to worry about His reputation. Let Him defend His own name. But I did not want those teens to think of God as the One who raises hopes only to disappoint them. We are God’s hands and feet. He uses us to bless others. But I didn’t have to defend Him; He had the pizza for them. In the same way I’m sure God has good things planned for me. I’ve already rejoiced about some things. I sang songs and shouted and danced and then it looked like disappointment again. But God is not going to let me go out like that. Just like I told those kids – that’s not the kind of God He is.
I’m thinking about how the disappointments can make the blessings seem even sweeter. After those setbacks and disappointments the kids were even happier when that pizza was actually placed in their hands. They wouldn’t have had the same joy and appreciation if someone had just handed them pizza in the beginning. No, they were denied, then had time to deal with their hunger, then received a promise, encountered a disappointment then finally the blessing. Sweet! Now that pizza wasn’t just a pizza but a prize.
God teaches us how to appreciate blessings. He knows we don’t appreciate things that come too easily. And He knows that we have to be taught to trust Him. I’m learning that no matter what happens in the middle, in the end I’m going to receive whatever God promised. I’ve been learning that setbacks and disappointments are just part of the process.
Again thank you Anointed Message for reminding me of Gods faithfulness. God bless you for those encouraging words and. For caring!
ReplyDeleteYou're so welcome and thank you so much Rachel for your encouragement!
ReplyDelete