Giving Up So God Can Show Up - and Show Out

 For if their purpose or activity is of human origin, it will fail. But if it is from God, you will not be able to stop these men; you will only find yourselves fighting against God.”
Acts 5:38b-39 NIV

A Message from Anointed Messenger

You may be aware that Anointed Messages has a text message ministry. Initially I invited a few people to receive texts, and then I mentioned it in devotionals to subscribers, and then on Facebook. The ministry grew and I could no longer send out texts using my Google Voice number. I shopped around for text delivery services but they can be rather expensive. Most charge per text sent, plus monthly fees. To send out a text everyday to a group of people can easily cost hundreds of dollars a month.

By the grace of God I found a service that is more affordable, and a friend volunteered to pay the costs as a seed. I thought that was really wonderful, but somehow we had miscommunication about how she would sow the seed. My free trial was drawing to an end and there was no further discussion about the money. I was tempted to inquire about it, but I’d already told God that I was leaving it all in His hands. If He didn’t provide the money then it wasn’t going to happen. I wasn’t going to “help God” by trying to make it happen.

I learned to let go the hard way. I’ve invested virtually everything into Anointed Messages, and gotten no financial return on the investment (yet). I was weary and didn’t have the funds nor desire to come out of my own pocket yet again. I needed to know that God was the One behind it all. Remind me to tell you about the children’s message I did that was instrumental in the creation of Anointed Messages another time.

Anyway the 22nd was my 9th anniversary of picking up and leaving everything to follow the call like Abraham did [Genesis 12:1-3], and I felt like I had nothing to show for it. Yes some people have gotten blessed but I no longer own a home, my savings has dwindled, my lease has run out, and it's hard to envision how things can work out. After not making it to the Laundromat in time to do laundry :( I figured I might as well go to the post office. I hardly go to the post office because I only seem to get junk mail.

Well this day I saw there was an envelope for Anointed Messages with a name I recognized from the email address of someone who’s received Anointed Messages for many years now. It looked like it might be a check. Could this be the $20 that would pay for the text message ministry for the next month? Maybe. I’d had thoughts of getting a prepaid VISA so I wouldn’t be overcharged if the ministry grew. I’d stopped publicizing the ministry to keep it from getting too big/expensive.

When I got home I opened the envelope and it was indeed a check, but it was not the $20 I was hoping for. It was $500. Selah. I was so overwhelmed I had to just sit and cry for a few minutes, amazed by God. I truly believe it was because I took my hands off of the ministry that God was able to do something wonderful with it. God doesn’t need my two cents, nor my ideas about whom should give what and how or when.

God really does have a thousand cattle on a thousand hills, and He can put us on the hearts and minds of any of His children at the right time to give us the resources we need. But we have to have a genuine understanding that it really is His ministry, His child, His business, or whatever the thing is that we’ve been struggling over. God doesn’t need us competing with Him for control, nor worried about our pride or provision. I was totally ready to say “Hey God didn’t show up so there’s no more text ministry.” I think too many times what we think is perseverance or integrity is us trying to do things in our own strength or trying to save face. We may mean well, but God has to break us of everything that challenges his deity.

The check was dated October 1st, and I received it on the 22nd. I’d already said it seems to take me 21 days to do everything lately because the enemy fights me so hard. [Daniel 10:12-14] This seemed to be confirmation of that. But also there were times I was prompted to go to the post office but didn’t because past experiences taught me it would be a wasted trip. A reminder that trusting God sometimes means doing the same thing that hasn’t worked the last hundred times.

 

I Surrender All

I am so grateful, but I am also open. The main lesson I’ve learned is this is God’s thing, and God will take care of what’s His. A lot of times we say “The battle is the Lord’s”, but don’t truly understand the surrender that goes along with that. I think about the people who truly gave up before God showed up. Hannah surrendered her son Samuel, and God blessed her with more children [1 Samuel 2:20-21]. Abraham surrendered his beloved son Isaac (the long awaited promise) on the sacrificial altar [Genesis 22]. I wonder if Jacob ever surrendered his wife Rachel to God. He worked for her for 7 years, then 7 more when he received her sister instead. On one level it seems very romantic, but maybe Jacob held on to Rachel too tightly; and he ended up losing her in the end. [Gen 35:16-20] Everything in our lives should enhance our relationship with God — not compete with it. I pray you master the art of surrendering everything to God.

 Lord
I surrender all to You. Teach me how to truly let go of anything I am holding on to too tightly or in a way that limits what You want to do. Forgive me for allowing any desire or person or thing become too great in my life/mind/heart. Teach me how to give everything to You, because the battle is not mine but Yours. Help me always love and trust You in every situation.

 I Give Myself Away - William McDowell